tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post7457955304135457214..comments2024-01-01T15:38:28.710-05:00Comments on The Immortal Alcoholic: Surviving the Chaos: Adventures in Cancer Land...Linda Bartee Doynehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01820717772193440848noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-46005558354640880252014-08-12T18:34:19.639-04:002014-08-12T18:34:19.639-04:00Linda,
You never cease to amaze me with your stre...Linda, <br />You never cease to amaze me with your strength and ability to handle all that you do, and on top of it, share it with the world to help others. I knew when I met you and worked with you that you were awesome. <br />I believe that what you do for Riley is in his best interest, even if you do give him a glass of wine. If not one way, then another. Love you.Stolen Kisseshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02934968223545083696noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-53620145378229835522014-08-01T12:20:41.352-04:002014-08-01T12:20:41.352-04:00Linda, such an emotional upheaval to deal with aft...Linda, such an emotional upheaval to deal with after all you've been through. It sounds as if you are saying, I got him through drinking, just to be faced with cancer. Please know that one risk factor for colorectal cancer is heavy alcohol use, so this may be part of the continuum. I would recommend that you take the same approach with the oncologists that you did in your workbook, and gather all the information you can. For example: what is the recovery period post surgery? How long would he be in the hospital? What is the aftercare once discharged, and can Riley and you handle it? Same for chemo and radiation: what are the side effects, and how are they managed? How often would he have to come to the clinic for treatment? The same questions go to whether Riley should drink again: can you handle the results, assuming it's not just one martini a night, but soon half a handle...<br /><br />Be well,Jannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-1966798207173336992014-07-31T21:54:22.257-04:002014-07-31T21:54:22.257-04:00linda i think you are doing the right thing, if th...linda i think you are doing the right thing, if the old man is going to conk out anyway and he's not doing anyone any harm i don't see any problem with him drinking if he wants to, if he was you know, younger and in not as bad of shape as he is in i would advise against it but i dont see anything wrong with fufilling his last request.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-47680113367263375742014-07-30T17:47:35.809-04:002014-07-30T17:47:35.809-04:00As a recovered alcoholic who was previously diagno...As a recovered alcoholic who was previously diagnosed as end stage at the age of 59, I don't know why you'd give Riley a glass of wine. All it would do is reawaken the insatiable thirst for alcohol. It's not going to make Riley feel better, or improve his quality of life. In the end, it's only going to make him more miserable, because the physical craving will be reawakened.<br /><br />Sure, I have a psychological craving, but I no longer have a physical craving, and would no more take a drink than I would stab myself in the foot.<br /><br />If you continue to give Riley alcohol, you may as well forget him having surgery, or chemo and radiation. He's already 70 years old, in poor health, and all you'll be doing is killing him a little bit faster.<br /><br />Sorry to be so harsh, but I was lucky; today I'm healthy and physically active, engaged with my family and friends. This is after I was given six months to live.<br /><br />As someone else said, you seem to be the immortal enabler.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-47946066537371953942014-07-29T23:18:43.970-04:002014-07-29T23:18:43.970-04:00In my opinion anyone who is a caretaker of an alc...In my opinion anyone who is a caretaker of an alcoholic will probably end up in a situation like this. When I question my decision to divorce my alcoholic exhusband almost 30 years ago I reread the medical information on this blog and today I have no regrets for leaving. And am grateful I am not in Linda's place.<br /><br />Three weeks ago I was at a hospital looking at a friend of mine who is 60 years old and has been drinking her whole life. I knew she liked to "party" and worked a job her whole life and was still working. <br /><br />She started to throw up blood and her husband took her to the hospital. They sedated her as she went through detox, found out she has cirrhosis of the liver and hepatitis and her liver is totally shot, kidneys failed two days later, entire body is bloated, skin is yellow, and she has a bleeding hole in her stomach, on dialysis 24/7 for first 2 weeks in Intensive Care and now daily for 2 hours.<br /><br /> Her husband is in shock. Machines are keeping her alive I guess. Doctors say she will probably die. Who knows. She has insurance and is still in the hospital. She just lays there all bloated up with the ventilator and all the other machines pumping away. It was a sight I never want to see again. My friend laying there like that. If she lives she might be a vegetable. Probably need organ transplants. Who knows. Her husband and the doctors will eventually have to make decisions. <br /><br /> I am not sure what I would do if I was the caretaker of an alcoholic. I just could not do it.<br /> Last night I went back to Alanon and spent a long time just crying the past few weeks. So sad. <br /><br />And I found out that the alkie exhusband is now in a hot prison in Texas. Apparently he got sentenced to probation for 6 months, later extended to a year and 6 months and then it was revoked. He was sentenced to 2 1/2 years in prison and locked up. Drinking is a violation of probation.<br /><br /> I am just going to keep going to alanon meetings for a bit to get me through this. I hate alcoholism. Just got to turn it over to God and let it all go. It is too much for me. So much grief.<br /><br />You are in my prayers Linda. <br /> Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-53635604054226331652014-07-29T13:14:52.683-04:002014-07-29T13:14:52.683-04:00I don't feel that I can argue with logic like ...I don't feel that I can argue with logic like that. I gave him a glass of wine with his dinner tonight. - You really should change the name of this to "the immortal enabler" - I'm disgusted!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6759421079279172044.post-34601683444217599742014-07-28T15:32:52.055-04:002014-07-28T15:32:52.055-04:00Linda, my prayers are with both you and Riley. I ...Linda, my prayers are with both you and Riley. I can see how difficult your post was, and I am wishing strength for you during this time. <br />ChaunceyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com