About a month ago, one of the greatest actors in our time,
Robin Williams, admitted himself into the Hazelden Addiction Center in
Lindstrom, MN. He had publicly announced that he was an alcoholic back in
2006. It is unclear, so far, if Mr. Williams, had been drinking recently.
In my opinion, alcohol is a chameleon. It is disguised to be
the thing you need, when in fact it is exactly what you DON’T need. The advertising says liquor creates fun when in fact it creates chaos.
In my youth, I remember going out with a group of friends
with drinking as the means to “lighten up” and “enjoy the moment.” The next
morning, I did NOT enjoy that moment hanging my head over the toilet.
I hear
young people now who are very excited about the idea of going out and getting
so drunk they can’t walk – “I’m going out and I’m going to get sooooo drunk…”
Then you hear about the fights, hook-ups, and general bad behavior nonsense and
I have to ask myself, why was that was so much fun?
Later on, if I had a tough day at work, I’d open a bottle of
wine and have a few glasses just to take away some of the stress. All the wine
usually did was make me open up about my stressful day and re-live it over
again. Guess what? The stress was right there in my office when I returned to
work.
Our society drinks alcohol. It is a fact that cannot be
disputed. We are a society that uses alcohol to celebrate happy times and
alleviate the pain of bad times. In my opinion, our society creates situations
that generate alcoholics and then we shun them as though they are less human
than those of us who are not afflicted with alcoholism. Alcoholics must hide the fact that they are alcohol dependent because they do not want to be labeled as being something as distasteful as an alcoholic. Of course, that’s just
my opinion.
Robin Williams was depressed, or at least that’s what the
news media is telling us. I believe it. I have no reason not to believe it.
However, I wasn't at his house when he died and I have no first-hand knowledge
of what actually happened. I only know what the publicity agents want me to
know.
What I do know is this: Depressed people often mistakenly turn
to alcohol to give them that “pick me up” that they need because the hype is
that it will make them feel better. It is not unusual that people mask or
medicate their depression with alcohol. However, alcohol is a depressant and
the more alcohol consumed, the more intense the depression. The alcohol takes
over and the voluntary action of drinking to medicate turns into drinking to
feed the alcohol addiction which is making the depression worse. It becomes a
descending spiral that leads to many physical complications generating the need
to mask other pains from such things as liver failure, coronary heart disease,
brain damage, etc. The alcohol now has complete control over the depressed
person and adds the gift of poor physical health.
The only way out is through some form of rehab/recovery
program. However, if the program only treats the alcoholism and not the
depression, the chance of relapse is strong. In my opinion (again), when an
alcoholic is admitted for detox and follows with rehab, the rehab portion
should be in conjunction with intensive psychological therapy to get to the
root of the depression. Without the treatment of the depression it is like
removing only half of a cancerous tumor. The tumor just continues to grow and
eventually kill the patient.
The first movie that made me fall in love with Robin
Williams was Good Morning, Viet Nam! Many of my friends had fought in that
war and since Mr. Williams was close to my age, and I had married a Viet Nam
vet with PTSD issues, this movie was very relevant to me.
Having had my own life threatened as author of this blog, I
understand why celebrities sequester themselves from the prying eyes of the
public. There is a danger in notoriety. It’s too bad that celebrities must hide
their anguish and put up a brave front for fear of letting all of us “fans”
down. If I could say something to Robin
Williams before he did whatever he did that caused him to leave us, it would
be: “Thank you for the laughter you bring into my life. If you ever need
someone to help you remember that your life is worth living, you can call on
me.” I doubt he would have called… but I would have left that door open not
because he’s a celebrity, but because he is a human being.
I think the programme he was on at Hazelden will have been good for what he was suffering. Why do I say that? 10 years ago this summer I was in a residential rehab in the UK - based on a programme similar to the Hazelden one, when set up 20 years before the counsellors were known as the Minnesota Mafia!
ReplyDeleteThe programme there told me that I was an alcoholic as I was using alcohol to treat my depression. Personally I'm not sure if I'm a depressive alcoholic of an alcoholic who is depressed... which comes first becomes meaningless once you are over a certain point in addiction in my mind.
Whatever today I'm sad that Robin lost his battle, also, and this tells me I truly am an alcoholic, I'm glad it wasn't me that failed today.
It is indeed a sad thing that people make the decision that living is more painful than dying. But I do believe that sometimes, no matter whether alcohol is involved or not, people get to a point in which depression is so overwhelming that all hope is lost. That is a dark black hole that I have seen more than one person travel into.
ReplyDeleteI have read that alcoholism co-occurs with other disorders, depression being one. I believe that. And I do believe that there is the physical craving, the mental obsession, and a spiritual malady in real alcoholics.
You are saying what I have been thinking about my husband. After the detox before last, I knew that he so needed help with what depresses him and I felt like they had only addressed the alcoholism and that was why he just relapsed again. He has issues he has never faced about his own mother dying from her alcoholism when he was a teenager. In those days the doctor gave him some strong pills to relax and make it through the funeral. They probably had alcohol to cope too. Never did he, his brother and father have a chance to work through their grief and I feel like that is the root of the depression. I recently drove my husband to his mothers grave and he simply sat there and wept. I hope that will be the beginning for him to find his way out without any alcohol or pills to dull his senses. It's a battle everyday for all that are afflicted
ReplyDeleteI saw a mouse struggling in a glue trap. I wonder if it thought about how it shouldn't be there.
ReplyDeleteMice don't think!!!!!
DeletePsychological Projection
ReplyDeletePsychological projection is a theory in psychology in which humans defend themselves against unpleasant impulses by denying their existence in themselves, while attributing them to others. Wikipedia
I am so sorry for Robin Williams and his family. My father committed suicide because of depression. He did not drink....in fact, I never saw him touch a drop of alcohol in my whole life.....but, he could not beat depression. His suicide left a huge hole in my heart, as I was only 23 at that time. Now, being 40 years later....I wish I could have helped him in some way. Depression is a demon so many cannot beat.....and coupled w/alcohol, it can surely be deadly. RIP Robin Williams. My prayers for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteThere must be available help for those who are depressed and alcoholic, whether they’re famous or not. It’s pretty hard to start a battle against those advertisements about alcohol, but we shouldn’t stop stating our opinions against alcohol. Aside from wasting your money in a bottle of vodka, you’ll also suffer from the headache and nausea after your “happy hour.” Whoever you are and whatever you do, it’s best to reach out to those who are alcoholic and help them in their way to sobriety. Thanks for sharing your encouraging thoughts, Linda! I’m sure you'll post more encouragement to all your readers. :)
ReplyDeleteDonnie Benson @ Midwest Institute
"I drink because I'm depressed, I'm depressed because I drink." Is there a source for this quote? Thanks!
ReplyDelete"I drink because I'm depressed, I'm depressed because I drink." A source for this quote? Thanks!
ReplyDeleteJoe -- I don't think it is a quote from anyone or anything. It's just a title I came up with. I may have heard it somewhere, but I have no idea where. Sometimes I hear things and they just sit there in my head until I can use them. -- Linda
ReplyDeleteLove it.... I've never drank before but I am drinking g now... Thank you! May God be with all of us!
ReplyDeleteI hope you keep blogging. You have a lot to offer the world, and at this time, the world needs some experience, strength and most especially, hope.
ReplyDeleteRehab center Indianapolis
I'm 64 and still drinking. both my parents were alcoholics and my mother died at 62 from malnutrition, she drank and smoked herself to death. she was 68 pounds when she died. my sister was a smoker and died 11 years ago at 62 from a stroke, my brother died of suicide 10 years ago. after drinking a bottle of j.d. he took a fork to his wrist and litterally dug the life out of him. he was 62. his daughter had the pleasure of finding him, she had 3 small children at the time. i have 1 sister left and she never drank or smoked but is 120 pounds overweight and on oxegine 100% of the time. i live in a beautiful home with a beautiful woman, my wife and we even have a few bucks in the bank. i just can't seem to quit drinking and it pisses me off, but apperantly not enough do do something about it.
ReplyDelete